A Life Unlived

I never saw it coming, I could never have imagined, and to this day it remains the most horrific, saddest day of my life and our lives as a family.I remember vividly the sad, deep desperation in the wailing of my uncontrolled grief as I dropped to my knees, with my face in my hands, as I slowly rocked back and forth in the middle of our kitchen floor. The telephone, still answered, lying somewhere on the floor beside me.Home alone, gasping for breath, and screaming at the top of my lungs with every ounce of emotional desperation I could possibly muster, I turned my tear-drenched face to the sky as I begged my God for it not to be true. Please, Lord in Heaven, make this not be true. It just can't be.During those desperate minutes as my heart was shattering, I lost conscious understanding that despite how much I screamed and pleaded for God to help me, the more I weakened and sobbed, it was indeed true and there would be nothing I could do about it. I wouldn't be able to fix this.It was done.