Injecting Chocolate and Other Fairly Stupid Ideas

Bill Boerman-Cornell is a man on a mission; a variety of them, in fact. From e-mailing ProFlowers.com about injecting himself with sweets to asking if pregnancy massage will help with his stretch marks, Boerman-Cornell has left an indelible impression on dozens of unsuspecting correspondents. Now he can make one on you. In an absurd series of e-mails, the lonely competitive eater of lore poses the questions you've always wanted to ask but never dared: does FedEx ever ship live human beings? Is there such a thing as a were-wombat, and does my daughter show symptoms of having been bitten? Is the Sasquatch an endangered species, and if not, when does bowhunting season open? Writer Jan Kaarsvlam provides a glimpse into a bizarre world where gregarious pets are banned from internet message boards and corporate executives wake up in a cold sweat, waiting for unbidden film crews to arrive on their doorstep. He invites you along for the trip, a trip you won't regret.