"Un Portion of Chips, Bitte"

Graham Nash is a Professional Reflexologist and part-time presenter on Britain's smallest commercial radio station - Two Loch Radio - in north west Scotland. He travelled to Switzerland 30 years ago attached to a school party and made a fool of himself at Basel station. Scarred, he hadn't been abroad since. Wife, Val, crossed the Channel in a Force 9 gale to attend an agricultural show in Paris in 1982. Didn't get placed and hadn't been abroad since. Rory is the scarred teenage offspring of the above scarred parents and had never been abroad. Pooling their dearth of travel experiences, adding a total lack of camping knowledge and a criminal lack of foreign language skills, the three Nash's embarked on a three month-long ramble around Europe in their motor home - 'Harvey the RV' - in the Spring of 2010. Their 'Graham and Val's Mid Life Crisis Tour 2010' took them through ten countries in 100 days. During their epic voyage they immersed themselves - which is to say, drowned - in the languages they encountered, attempted a collective nervous breakdown in Italy, observed role-play sex education in a German swimming pool, stayed on an Austrian campsite managed by Stewart Grainger, scootered down a Swiss alp, became ensnared in the Brugge cycle grand-prix and enjoyed several incomprehensible conversations with restaurant waiters - one of which resulted in a meal concluding with a glass of warm milk. 'Un Portion of Chips, Bitte' is the hilarious day-by-day account of their 6000 mile trip, the only part of which was planned was the return ferry crossing to and from Calais. Their motto? 'Look stupid, act stupid, speak rubbish'; and they did!